Am I the embodiment of Farmer – whose work is not done? Many people have laughed at me, banned me, said I was insane when I gave Victoria Rosamond Bond, a bodyguard-lover that looked like Tarzan. I begin my book with the death of Starfish.
Victoria could not believe her luck. Admiral Sinclair was being stationed in Japan and asked Victoria Bond if she wanted to purchase his Aston Martin. The second she lay eyes on it in the parking lot, Miriam wanted to drive it.
‘You don’t know how to drive!” offered Victoria, relieved that her lover was not going to get behind ‘Her Dream’ and more than likely – wreck it.
“You can teach me! I am a quick learner!” Retorted Starfish – who gave her dear friend – the look.
“Shit!” Bond said, and was now googling the nearest airport where there was always a airport road that no one uses. She found one that was long enough to get her Aston thru her gears. As promised, Miriam proved to be a very fast learner!
This post is tailormade for the City Government of Belmont, who is not censoring my posts this time – so far! I was on my way to a BIG PAYDAY – with gobs of fame with my James Bond novel – when I beheld Pussy Riot being beaten, whipped, and their hair pulled, by Putin’s Goon God Squad. My heterosexual book – was toast! I did the right thing! Play the first video with full sound, and the second video with the sound down, to know……who the real savages of the world are.
A week ago I was going to blog on a reunion at the Palace Hotel with fundraiser for ‘The Royal Janitor’. There would be a train trip to Belmont where a Celebrity Labyrinth would be made in Twin Pines Park. I would invite my Star, Lara Roozemond, and, my Muse, Rena Easton, whose grandmother was so grateful I rescued her, a Beautiful Damsel in Distress. I am so grateful to the World Wide Web for making my dream come true. I have not let my women down.
John Presco 007
Copyright 2021
President: Royal Rosamond Press
The Royal Janitor
Chapter Three
When Victoria told Starfish they were going to Eugene Oregon to track down what became of the Rose Division amongst the Habsburgs, she let out a spine-altering scrrrrrreeeee! She then shook all over, began to sweat profusely, and went into a trance. Victoria retreated, and Sharena got out from behind her desk, just in case she had to make a bee-line for the exit as Starfish made super rapid foot movements with quck turns in different directions. She would later tell the folks at BAD that this was the Lek black grouse dance she learned in South Africa where she and her father fled to get away from Vladimir Putin when he became Premiere of Russia.
“I’m going to bring my drum! This is a dream come true. My mother was born in Eugene. I’ve never been there! Screeeeeee!”
“You own a drum? Why isn’t this in the report? By any chance have you heard of John von Bond?”
“Nope! But, have you heard of the Oregon Country Fair! My Kabalak Klock is telling me this is a Kosmic Konnection made in another dimension. What great timing! We are going to enter the Royal Drum Vortex. I am forbidden to ever step foot in Eugene, but, I don’t give a shit! This is it! You’re going to see – the real me! I want you to promise you will get me back to BAD!”
Victoria came in sideways to get Starfish, she twisting this way, then that, to avoid the gyrating flesh that clung to Agent 008 like kelp in a tidepool. Taking hold of her arm, she was shocked when Starfish turned in anger, and was about to slap her hand away.
“Don’t you dare! You got to come with me – now! Professor Bond is about to give his lecture.”
Starfish let out a whimper, and was pouting. Many hands tried to pull her back into the drum circle where she was a star. An old hag came up to them.
“Can we have her?”
Starfish gave Victoria a look of, hope. Perhaps things will continue to go her way.
“I’m sorry. She’s not mine to give!”
Again there came a whimper from Their Star, who made clopping sounds with her sandals all the way to the car. When she grabbed her drum, and clicked the trunk open, Victoria stamped her feet.
“No! You have to concentrate. Now get in!”
On the way to the University of Oregon, Starfish ran into her pad looking for more info on Professor John von Bond.
“Here’s a stalking report on him. Some chic is trashing his blog. She says it’s real creepy. Let’s have a looksee!”
“Does he say he’s related to me?’
“No, but he claims he is a Comet King, heir to the teaching of Meher Baba!”
“Who’s that? Never mind. We’re here”
Victoria parked haphazardly and put her DIPLOMAT shield in the window. Starfish never went to college. This was her first time on a campus. She took in all the beautiful students. The young women took notice of her, and turned their heads after she passed them. Their was an amazing aura about her. Waves of goosebumps went up and down her half naked body. There was fine mist of perspiration that caught the last light, and were like tiny rainbows. She was electrically charged due to her amazing dancing. However, she was not happy when the beautiful young men did not even look at her. Their heads were down, their eyes locked on their phone screens. At six-two, Starfish wondered if they were intimidated.
Finally, she grabbed one, on his way up river to spawn.
“Excuse me. I couldn’t help but notice your features. Victoria raised her eyebrows when she gently took hold of his chin.
“Very symmetric. I can see your father’s profile. And, you have your mothers high cheekbones. Did you know you are half your mother,and half your father, but, it is through your father…..you find God. Did you know that?…….I’m going to kiss you now!”
Victoria made a move to prevent this kiss, but, was repelled by a powerful energy field that she put around – them. Tilting his head back, Victoria delivered a soft and sensuous kiss, that froze them in time. His cellphone fell to the walkway, but, did not break. There was a beautiful sigh, that sounded like the opening of Morning Glories.
“You can go, now!” And Starfish watched him swim away. Turning, she stopped in her tracks when she saw Victoria was blushing. Their eyes were locked. She got it. Victoria dreamed of being kissed like that. Star approached, took her hand, and they walked the next hundred yards like this, they a rarity, as holding hands on campus went out of style twenty years ago.
“I was conceived a hundred yards from here. I feel it in my bones! I was made – with much love!”
After the Professors one hour lecture, and after taking him to a Cosmic Dinner at the Bum’s Rush Herbal Salad Bar, Victoria was ready to take in an American baseball Game, and get some R&R. Her mind was turning into silly-putty. She needed to get grounded by doing something totally inane. She could not use her mind one minute more, and, had found following American baseball to be totally relaxing. She ate up pitching and batting statistics like they were vallum and Prozac. She knew where this data had come from, and, where it was going. She compared it to knitting.
Miriam seemed spent after her dance-a-thon. John had put her in her place and came close to 86ing her from his lecture after she challenged him about his credentials. She had her I-pod tuned to her favorite music and was ready to hang for a couple of hours while her partner got her jollies. But, this was not meant to be.
Finding the baseball park nearly empty, they took seats right behind the catcher. The Eugene Emeralds were having a terrible season, and were in the cellar. Starfish’s head was bouncing around like she was in the rear window of a automobile. Then, HE came to the mound, and, she froze. He froze too, in the middle of his wind-up. These were warm-up pitches, or, that would have been a balk. There was her beautiful head, hovering above the umpire. Wow! What a…..Enchantress? Dalton shuddered. No woman had looked at him that way. Does she know me?
Victoria was coming back to her seat with her arms full of popcorn hotdogs, banners, soda-pop, and cracker jacks. She noticed the dead silence, and found the source. Their deep gaze was locked onto one another. If you poured cold water om them, they would not flinch.
“Here! Take some of this!”
Miriam did not hear. When she spotted the program under Victoria’s arm, she yanked at it with a growl!
“What the….?”
“I must know his name! She let out a whimper when she read “Dalton Geekie. Oh my God. What a perfect name. It means Town in the valley – with ‘crag’. “Dalton” she whispered, and then charged into her Music Ap for just the right song – their song!
“It’s here! Thank you Jesus!” Looking up, Starfish crossed herself.
“Play Ball!” the umpire shouted, and when Dalton gave the sign of the cross across his powerful chest, Miriam’s heart went pitter-patter – KERTHUNK!
Victoria had her Em’s cap on backwards, and thought she looked pretty cute. She wanted just a little limelight. It would help if someone noticed her and gave her some flirtation. What she was not ready for, was a Christian Warm-up Mating Ritual – with a raging Psychic Empathic meltdown! Miriam’s words came back to haunt her
“I am forbidden to go to Eugene! But, who gives a shit!”
There should have been some questions asked here. But, now it was too late. Starfish had locked her Victim up in an intuitive mind-probe. As the sad Cellos played ‘As I Walk Alone Down the Road’, the movie of her parents first meeting, began to roll. The blanks were being filled in as the first tears welled in Starfishes eyes.
Her father was a Russian who had a scholarship in track. He was winning every hurdle race he was put in. Warming up, he spotted her, in the bleachers. They had to have one another. When the starter pistol went off, they were under the bleachers, mashing their lips together, ripping away at their sports clothes. When they came at the same time, there was loud cheering. One sperm made it to the finished line, and, Miriam was created.
Almost thrown off the team, Ivan made a pledge to the track coach that he would stay away from that Jezebel. She was banned from the stadium, but, Ivan caught a glimpse of Sarah now and then looking thru the bars of the gate. Their love, was banished! This is how Miriam was going to play it for the next three hours, to Victoria’s utter disgust. The mesh of the backstop did not filter out any of their pathos and lust. It was a profound barrier that multiplied their love – ten fold. This, was a Forbidden Love – the best kind!
“Fuck!” Victoria whispered aloud, knowing she could not be heard above a gallery of unhappy cellos. Or, is she listening to morose Gregorian chants, again?
“My new best friend in a Russian Drama Queen!”
The coach thought about taking Dalton out of the game, but, when Miriam began to sob and wail, the crowd got into it. Victoria buried her head in the stats sheet.
“Fuck!”
The trademark of an empath is feeling and absorbing other people’s emotions and/or physical symptoms because of their high sensitivities. These people filter the world through their intuition and have a difficult time intellectualizing their feelings. As a psychiatrist and empath myself, I know the challenges of being a highly sensitive person. When overwhelmed with the impact of stressful emotions, empaths may experience panic attacks, depression, chronic fatigue, food, sex, and drug binges, or exhibit many other physical symptoms that defy traditional diagnosis.
When Miriam beheld the people climbing the stairs to the Jordon Schnitzer Museum, she let go of Victoria’s hand, skipped across the grass, and bounded up the steps – four at a time! Her entrance was like Nureyev flying across the stage. She was an escapee from Botticelli’s Primavera. People gasped! They thought she was part of a show. She was the star ballerina and the Constantine Christian Nudist Camp where she was homeschooled. This was her first encounter with an institution of higher learning.
Espying a group of people before a painting down the hall, she was upon them in seven giant steps. Her long arms reached in, and pushed them aside. There was some complaints. But, when they turned to see a goddess with roses in her hair, and with eyes the color of the sea, they parted as she zeroed in.
Everyone’s mouths were now open, like hers was open. They were seeing this painting for the first time through Myriam’s eyes. She came closer. Her long neck was craned, as she made a figure eight with her head. Now she turned sideways, and starting in the lower left corner she moved her eye across the image, slowly, till she reached the up left corner. Bending down again, she moved even closer, and ran her right eye along the work. People were astonished with her. It was a magnificent ballet. Her long arms moved her hands just above the surface as if she was taking the painting in through some kind of osmosis.
“Oh my God! There is a Möbius circle in here – and PI! How did he do this? First he is the self, then he is the audience. He goes into a total intuitive state, does a loop over, then dips down into the subconscious. Now he is walking on the dark side of the moon. There is no hope for his return. His work is surrendered to a higher power who ingnites a spark of divine inspiration! Alas, he bursts forth in The finishing!………It is Finns!
Myriam turns to face her audience. Her blue-green eyes fill with a look of astonishment.
“He is……Co-Creator!”
Around twelve people – burst out in applause!
“How wonderful!”
“I never realized this before!”
“What beauty!”
“She is – so right!”
Like a panther, she left this work and stalked off looking for another. The people moved in a fill the void. They soaked up the energy Myriam left behind. Their eyes had been opened.
Victoria watched her amazing friend, her head was above the rest, as she gazed around from the top of the mountain she had just climbed.
“Come Starfish. We are late!”
Moving into a large room, they got their first look at Mr. von Bond. There was a long leather seat with six people sitting before their Master. Myraim crept up on the seat, pushed two people aside, then sat smack dab in the middle, up front, not but fifteen feet of the old wizard that reminded Myriam of the Russian Saint Nicholas. John was going to give her something valuable – for free! She dared not move lest she be disqualified, deprived of this blessing.
John, was completely unnerved. He had to blink several times, because it was like looking at a photograph, a still life, a breathing portrait, that did not move an inch! This beautiful creature had roses in her hair. She was so completely, so utterly, receptive. And, she was more than wide awake. There was an awaking going on inside her. John von Bond, felt like a work of art. He was, her masterpiece. She, had found him.
Not everyone in Lane County has a ‘Tree Therapist’. Two weeks after we met, she let down her golden hair that was like flax. She was transformed.
“Starfish!…..Is that you?” I said to my inner divine author. Calm down Mr. Presco. You can get in trouble for…..this!
Three weeks later, I talked about what inspires me to write. She told me she uses themes in her performances. Then she showed me…..this!
I felt like – feinting! I recalled young girls doing such a routine on Adam’s Street during the Whitaker Celebration. They descended from great oak trees! I was afraid to tell my TT my vision.
Last week I told my other therapist I was going to Hayward Field, He told me ______and Rapunzel were going. I told them I hoped to see them there. I employ the name Rapunzel to keep her identity a secret. I did try to tell her I created Starfish to be my bodyguard – too – because I suffer from PTSD. I chickened out. The time was not right, The moment has arrived. I will now e-mail this to my TT. She has helped me get grounded, and works with a wondrous spirit – to heal me!
Thank you!
John Presco
President: Royal Rosamond Press
EXTRA! I just realized Rapunzel is the rebirth of the Turnverien dream of Carl Janke. She has done trapeze!
“My middle name is Jane!” exclaimed Starfish in a melcoholic way. My mother hated her husband’s fixation with the JOHN name. They were arguing on the Oregon Coast, and Virginia pointed to a starfish in a tidepool.
“This is what our daughter will be called!”
Beneath the gold onion domes of the Danilov Monastery a few miles south of the Kremlin, Vladimir Putin’s chief shaman explains why Russia is hell-bent on destroying Ukraine.
Above is a pic of a model I barrowed off the internet. I misplaced her name. In my James Bond book ‘The Royal Janitor’ Miriam Starfish Christling marries her boss, Victoria Rosemond Bond. She moves out of her treehouse on the grounds of Osborne House. My book is over five years old. Victoria was a heterosexual until I saw Putin’s Cossacks whipping women. My aim was to protect LGBTQ people, and not promote them. With DeSantis’ attack on Gay People and Black History, there has not been such a Bond Battle that takes in the War in Ukraine that NATO and Japan – support!
DeSantis says he will not backdown in his vile holy Jihad with Disney. I tell you this day, Starfish will not back down, and, she hereby challenges DeSantis, Putin, and Kirill to a Holy War of Words, not unlike the one that Elijah fought against the Priests of Baal. The Battle of Bohemian Grove is the most prophetic post of many I have made. The Sword of God – is by my side!
Putin’ s men took Starfish and Victoria to a special prison, where a hologram of the Russian leader introduced our BAD agents to foreign prisoners. One was a giant of a woman that played basketball. Miriam told this forlorn woman that she was an athlete, an amazing hurdler – who has never competed!
“We ran in a grove of trees felled in a windstorm. Ivan competed at Hayward field in Eugene Oregon.”
One of the men behind the mirror got on Google and brought up Victoria Thachuk, a Ukrainian hurdler that will compete at Hayward field, while Russia is banned. Putin’s hologram was fed this information, and his image pointed to a screen. When a video of Viktoriya in a race was played, both our spies gasped.
I awoke last night from a dream where Rena and I were homeless again. I realized we had lived in a enlightened state that caused us both to start glowing. We lived in a tent in the forest for fifty days. I got up and looked in the mirror. My face and beard was glowing. My blue eyes were like crytstals.
I went and turned on my T.V. and beheld two blond news-spell casters for the pure Aryan Christian-right. They had eyes like doll eyes. They were praising their fearless leader’s failed attempt to sign peace treaty with insane Nuclerar Terrorist. A chart was produced that showed how much time CNN spent covering the Fake Hearing. No image of the Naughty Check given to Cohen for silencing a Porn Star, was shown. One blue-eyed crystal being of the Pre-Rapture, looked to be seventeen years of age. She was very hard on the Democrats who couldn’t wait for The Trumpeter to fail.
“There will be much gleeful celebrating in Pelosiville tonight!”
I blinked my eyes because I saw Barbie and Tinkerbelle. My autistic friend would come over and watch her innocuous cartoon movies. There are pastel color patterns floating about. I am reminded of North Korean propaganda flicks. My post this morning was going to titled……’Hard Attack of the Blue Crystal-eyed Sheenas’. Then I found the movie ‘Green Mansions’ starring Audrey Hepburn and Tony Perkins, and my mind was – FRIED!
“What?!!!!!”
Then I found the movie ‘Sheena’ who looks like a young Mega-Meg. Is this the inspiration for the movie Black Panther?
“You’re trippen, Jon. Calm down!” my inner vloice said. Then I heard this;
“You’re on BLACID.”
“What is Blacid?”
“Its the new pure-blue Aryan drug invented by the evangelical magicians who work for Fox News! Remember the liquid blue acid you took in 1966?”
“Oh! That! Can we go directly to Nirvana? Do I got to go through Pixie Hollow?”
Rosamond Press 
Leave a comment