The Story of Rosamond
by Jon Presco
The Tale of the Bathrobe Lawyer
When I was seventeen, I talked to Raymond Burr on the phone about my artwork hanging in his Hollywood gallery. Marilyn had moved in with Kathy who had been Mayor Yorty’s persona secretary. Then she got pregnant, and fired. She knew a lot of celebrities. She asked me if I would like to meet Raymond and have my first art show in his gallery. We talked, and he invited me to dinner. Kathlene warned me he was going to seduce me, and, I called back, and canceled. I could have had my first show with the help of a great collector of art.
Raymond says Erle Standely Gardener chose him to play Perry Mason. Royal Rosamond taught Erle how to write. In making America Great Again, I introduce to you ‘The Bathrobe Lawyer’. The BL is a cross between Melvin Belli and Perry, who Rosemary had a crush on because he looked like Vic. Belli made San Fransico great! We were glad to have ‘The King of Tort’ living in the Bay Area. He was terribly bright and eccentric. Cayrl Chessman considered hiring him. He did hire William Lindhart to be his Private Investigator. Bill taught my friend all he knew, and he came to Rosamond’s funeral to conduct an inviestigation. He also saw the suede jacket, and we went to Rocky Point.
I am watching David Lynch’s ‘Twin Peaks’ and am bein influenced. David aspired to be an artist, and thus is making works of art, more so than movies. I see my BL being a Kafkaish character like Orson Welles in ‘The Trial’. The heads of our government are lawyering up. Where is the People’s Attorney?
My T.V. series ‘The Bathrobe Lawyer’ is about an old Bohemian guy who has a nose for fake news. After President Trump gets the Supreme Court to rule Fake News is against the Constitution, it is now a matter of convicting the purveyors of FN, a victimless crime! Realizing it was a mistake for the Conservative Right to render only one man a eccentric and idiot savant – who is forever in the spotlight – men like Jon Presco were voted massive amounts of money to conduct their Legal Crusade and Witch Hunt.
Owning untold legal power, with no law degree, Mr. Presco goes after the Carmel Pinecone for printing fake news about his late sister, the world famous artist known as Rosamond. The European Union is translating and broadcast this man’s amazing assumptions. His story about being kicked out of 9th. grade Enlgish class for giving a report on Chessman’s book, has earned him the Victor Hugo award. Europe needs an American Savior to replace Trump and Bannon.
Vic’s father, Victor Hugo Presco, was a professional gambler in the Barbary Coast. (true!) Vic was born in San Francisco. I get to do this! I get to play a Famous Lawyer from the 40’s. Consider ‘The Maltese Falcon’! I add character to Art and Literature! Fuck the ‘Great White Sanity Hearing’ conducted by outsiders, and obscure member of my family – who never met us! Jon is also up for the Hemmingway award – even though he has not won his case – that rings true! He will haul in his great fish. All things in my video are true.
They make buoyant jackets. My grandfather would go out to the Channel Islands with his friend Dashiell Hammed, and camp, along with other members of the Black Mask. Belli, Chessman, and Jack Ruby, were men with very high I.Q.s. San Franciscans were proud of our smart folks involved in the Criminal Justice System. Today, we are subjected to a Confederacy of Dunces.
Belli was famous for his props and stunts in the Courtroom. ‘The day of The Casual Bathrobe Attorney will take us back to the film genre that made America Great! They will be allowed to hold trial in their homes via the social media. Expect summations to be given while these geniuses are sitting on the can.
Following his admission to the California bar, his first job was posing as a hobo for the Works Progress Administration and riding the rails to observe the Depression‘s impact on the country’s vagrant population. His first major legal victory came shortly after graduation, in a personal injury lawsuit representing an injured cable car gripman. Over insurance lawyers’ objections, Belli brought a model of a cable car intersection, and the gear box and chain involved in the accident, to demonstrate to jurors exactly what had happened.