The Oaks Motel – A Play

The Oaks Motel

A Play

by

Jon Presco

The Last Hippie on Earth, does not know he is the LHOE. At seventy one, and in poor health, he begs his old hippie friend to allow him to come visit him – before they both die!

Employing impeccable Lost Hippie Logic, he has backed his buddy, and his attorney wife, into a corner. There was that blood pact they made while looking for Time Portal in Honduras, so long ago. He is on the verge of discovering it was not, Sheena, who did not want him in her home, but Pretzel who did not want to see that fucking freak ever again. He could not accept that most people are motivated by ‘Love of Money’. Wanting money gave safe signals to fellow human beings. Everyone who knew Cecil, was afraid of him, because the “I’m Safe” sign never went off over his head. Pretzel was afraid if he came to the house, Cecil would discover the evidence he had ‘Copped Out’ all over the place. This might set him off. He might fly into a rage – and try to hurt himself, or…………..?

So Sheena paid for a room at ‘The Oaks Motel”. However, when Cecil called to say he was in town, and thanked her for getting him a room with a “color T.V.” she started reading things into this thank you. Was Sheena detecting a……deadly sarcasm?

Detecting that Sheena was tightening up, and on the verge of becoming a rea cunt, Cecil layed on her the itinerary he had in mind.

CECIL: “Hey Sheena ‘Of the Jungle’, I bet you like ribs. There’s a ‘Juan’s BBQ HUT across the street. I thought we can get a couple of racks and celebrate Epiphany Day’ in my room. Are you hep to what that is? I brought my costume. Do you and Pretzel have some glow lights?

Pretzel comes in and finds his wife trembling. There is urine rolling down her leg. Pretzel grabs phone.

PRETZEL: “What did you say to my wife – you dirty old fuck?”

CECIL: “You haven’t called me a “dirty fuck” in ages! Wow! Does that bring back memories!”

(The play Michael took me to see was ‘The Beard”. I could be wrong. You know the old saying…..”If you can recall, you weren’t there!”)

Michael McClure – The Beard and Beast Language